still.

hey, i know. I've been a very lazy updater nowadays. sorry! after all things that happens how i feel so insecure and heartbroken, things like this makes me so down and incomplete and thats why i don't have the guts to write. i will probably write i hate everyone and such stuffs. but now I'm better. just sometimes i feel a little empty. i miss my old life. i don't want to grow up!! i laugh i make people laugh, i go everywhere and i am sad. i try to be happy. but I'm not. how to do that? how to do "happy"? teach me. please. i need that so bad :(